2006-01-11
I Believes in Dinosaurs!
Dear Diary,
I’ve always wanted to open my journal with that line. . .I say it all the time in real life. . .any funny or awkward moment. . . “Dear Diary”. Or when someone’s been terribly naughty, I end up blurting out something to the sort of “Dear Mom. . .” Frankly this is hilarious to me, maybe not so much to the rest of the world, but to me, I could really pee my pants.
Speaking of peeing your pants, I’m so sorry for my MIA’ed’ness (I just made up that word). I know peeing your pants has nothing to do with someone gone missing, unless of course I’ve peed my pants and it has taken this long to recover, or change my pants. Alas, I do not have a bladder problem, I’ve just been gone. I’ve thought a lot about diaryland, and honestly have checked it daily and kept up with all of your lives, but writing hasn’t come easily to me lately. I’ve thought about writing, even put some order to thoughts and topics that I wanted to journal about, yet it has taken ages to just get the gumption to push the “Add an Entry” button. Maybe it was due in part to the realization that I don’t have a lot of things in the places that I would like them. We’re not talking about Feng Shuai (sp?) although my messy apartment could use a bit of that, I’m more talking about work and Drummer.
I haven’t spoken voice to voice with Drummer since before Thanksgiving. I am trying to understand all of this, trust me, I’m failing miserably. I’m working on letting go – still wear a dumb red ribbon around my left arm, to remind me to pray for him. I haven’t written him or called him. I did send him a Christmas card, his parents got one too. . .
Sunday of this week we were online at the same time and shared IMs. It was almost impersonal and frustrating – I wanted to call him out and ask him all of the questions that were on my heart, but I didn’t. I held my own, and asked a bit about life, general things. It hurts so much to know that you shared so much love with someone and to know that they have turned off their light switch. I apparently don’t have a light switch installed, rather I got a round dimmer light turner on thing. . .right now I’ve just begun to turn it down a bit. . .although the lights are dimming, there is still so much power behind it. So, that’s that.
I’ve talked to a few boys, nothing substantial. I really wanted to focus my dating life on guys that believe similarly as I do in my relationship with God. This doesn’t mean that every aspect of our lives have to match, but I really would like someone who has similar moral convictions, values and/or future desires. I was talking with this boy, we’ll call him DC. DC was completely opposite of me politically, yet the banter was interesting. He started to drive me nuts with his “I’m right, you’re wrong” long winded e-mails. Then as we are preparing to set up a date to the Museum of Natural History I find out that the, although in theory a God-believing man, is not a Christian, because Christians don’t believe in dinosaurs? He then proceeds to belittle me in any verbal way that he can – and eventually forwards me some guys blog trying to prove his point. Needless to say, DC is history. Ah, the wonderful world of dating – how I haven’t missed thee.
I’ve been working on keeping the resumes going out. I’ve had a few calls, one in Phoenix, but they were only willing to pay half of what I make now and not interested in paying moving expenses. I passed. Another here in the city, but again, salary doesn’t look too promising. Finally, I have a telephone interview on Friday, with one in Cleveland – that’s all I’m going to say about that – as not to jinx anything ;) ha, ha Not that I really believe in jinxing and all – ha, haa – anyway, it’s a job with another Christian organization, but a better situation – who knows.
My weekend/friend life has been outstanding for the last few months. I can’t believe how much I live for my weekends – which for the most part don’t include too much drinking. I’ve seen movies, done dinner, played games, gone for walks, had long coffee talks – I’m going to a museum this weekend, may shop a bit and get a pedicure. Quality time while doing something fun is so perfect for friendships!
Lately I’ve been running around like a lady with my head cut off. . .I know that was supposed to say chicken, but lady is what I typed, and I think a lady without a head would be funnier. So here I am running headless. . .I’m to go to London and Germany in March for a wedding (London) and a visit to Mrs. Hellyeah (Germany), thus I need my passport. . .which expired like 43 years ago. So a new passport is in order. I can’t find my old one. I can’t find my certified birth certificate. Through this whole ordering of documents process is freaking EXPENSIVE. My Birth Certificate on rush is $42. Then photos $25, then the Expedited Passport $150. I’m looking at over $200 before the freaking ticket. Sheesh, I sure must love these people! Now I get to fret over the cost of a ticket and hotel stays – ooh, fun. Anyone have a pad in London you’re willing to gift to me for a few days, early March? Still I’m terribly excited about going. Of all my worldly travels (there have been a plethora) I’ve never hit the UK or Germany – and I have people in both places whom I love. And frankly by that point, I will be will due for a good ‘ol fashioned holiday away! I can’t wait!!
Christmas turned into an awful – stray from healthy – lifestyle. I’m back on track though. I’ve been to the gym 4 times this year – not too great seeing it’s the 11th, yet I’m doing it! I’m aiming at losing 10lbs in the next 5 weeks (by Feb. 20th). Tomorrow I start my first Pilates class (being able to take classes was one of my goals in losing weight), and on Feb. 20th I begin my first weekly dance class since 2001!! I SO can’t wait! So aim ahead, Catie – you’re getting skinny and dancing again! High Five for me!
Okay, I should get back to the work set before me. Glad to be back, folks, glad to be back!